there's no waiting in the lobby //

i recently moved across the country to be a nanny for an amazing family in new york

it was a whole new world out here, i've been on the east coast before but this family lives in a way i've only ever seen on tv

it was exciting to be apart of

the kids were so fun and i enjoyed taking care of them

there was one day in particular that we went into the city

i went and explored rockefeller plaza, NBC studios, and st john's cathedral

i grew up watching the today show with my mom so it was amazing to be there in real life

new york city is exactly what everyone says it is: busy, crowded,  a million people rushing somewhere, taxis honking, massive buildings, bright lights etc etc

i couldn't believe i was really seeing and experiencing it

however, it was different than i expected in the fact that i didn't fall in love with it like everyone said i was going to. . .

maybe i didn't spend enough time there but amidst the skyscrapers i longed for the mountains

instead of rushing people i wanted rushing rivers

i sound so cliche . . . but i don't think the city life is for me

i remember walking into another tall building with beautiful architecture and golden doors

i was waiting for a friend

there i was standing in the lobby and the bell boy said to me, in a harsh and short manner:

     "there's no waiting in the lobby"

     "oh, i'm just waiting for a friend, she'll be down in a minute"

again, he said:

     "there's no waiting in the lobby"

so i walked out of those golden doors sort of frazzled

i remember thinking "wow, he wasn't very pleasant"

as i walked away i couldn't get those words out of my head

there's no waiting in the lobby

soon after i met up with my friend, we grabbed lunch among blue collar boys, and headed back to grand central station to catch the subway home

on the ride back the words still echoed

a few weeks went by and while new york was amazing and we spent some time at their exotic beach house in south carolina i couldn't help but feel like i wasn't supposed to be there

i felt like i was putting things on hold at home

i felt like i was missing out

i felt like i was getting behind

i didn't feel happy with where my life was going and the person i was becoming

so i made the hard decision and i quit my nanny job and came back to utah

so now i can go back to school

and start my elementary education program

and chase this pangea dream

and most importantly, be with my family and friends

because as that wise bell boy told me, there's no waiting in the lobby

likewise,

you can't wait to change your life

you can't wait to be the person you know you can be

you can't wait to be kind

you can't wait to tell someone you love them

you can't wait to finish school

you can't wait to chase your dreams

you can't wait to be happy

so i changed my mind and all my plans i had for the next year
at times it's been super stressful trying to figure out my life
but sometimes you just have just go for it
then somehow things start to fall into place
and now i'm so incredibly stoked where things are headed :)

just remember,

there's no waiting in the lobby

xoxo

nel

it's good to be home